Mary Loeffelholz is a Scumbitch + Official Apathy

Reader Carol asked me to re-post this stunning case of official stupidity involving a neglect case, and I totally agree that it's worth broadcasting. First, though, I'd like to remind every single horse owner out there: when you're selling or giving away a horse, USE A CONTRACT -- one like this that specifies that you get first rights to buy back the horse if the new owner ever wants to sell (or give it away). Some contracts even state that the previous owner shall have the right to inspect  the new owner's horse and property at any time, and describes the minimum care the horse has to receive. I don't know if that part is legally enforceable... but the buy-back clause is. If you don't spend five minutes signing this little piece of paper, your horse could end up like THIS, and there's legally nothing you can do about it:

Mary Loeffelholz of Belleville, WI, is the scumbitch responsible for this cruelty. She got horses from careless people who'd got horses from decent people who'd given those horses away...without a buy-back contract. However, it's the local officials who have been letting this crap continue. They've been scolding Mary to "do better" with her 20 horses for 4+ years, but not actually taking real any legal action against her, much less getting the starving horses out of her hands.

Cheri Carr, Dane County Humane Officer, had issued an abatement order to Loeffelholz in 2008. It ordered her simply to provide regular food and water to her animals-- an order she appealed! (Her appeal failed after even her own mother testified against her.) However, that order expired in May 2011, and nothing was done since then.

Several news articles, here and here have made much of the fact that eight of the starving equines are now off of Mary's property, but what they fail to mention is that that's not really the doing of the officials themselves.

Several previous owners of the horses showed up and just plain took four of them. After making them take the horses back to their abuser, officials finally sort of acted when faced with the wrath of the would-be rescuers. One of those horses was put into protective custody, and the cops convinced scumbitch Mary to surrender seven more.The was also partially due to the heroic efforts of Madison lawyer Cynthia Fiene, who has been trying to get someone to do something for years. (I hear she has a website, but I can't find it-- if you know it, please share!)

However, there are still twelve starving critters in Mary's hands-- though she's moved them to her sister's place, where she probably hopes everyone will forget about them. Which the cops probably will, because they're still not making any legal moves against her, despite apparently agreeing that the horses needed to get out of there. No shit Sherlocks.

The cops are making the usual excuses about how long the legal process is to seize animals, etc...but come ON, it really takes more than four years?! Bullshit. Doug Vogeli, Director of Environmental Health Division, had more excuses:

- The cost of boarding, feeding and caring for so many large animals "is an issue." Wait, you mean the cost of caring for animals that several people have screamed about saving and are already willing to take care of? And how is it that we can spend millions of dollars giving convicted criminals health care, cable tv and workout equipment, but we can't spend a dime on helping tortured animals? Finally, don't we have animal control and humane societies for exactly this purpose?

- "The standard of care may not be what other people would want the horses to be kept at but the minimum standards were being met," says Doug. But isn't the decision of whether the minimum standards are being met a judgement call? Animal control does have to follow the law, but when you're looking at a law that says, "food must be present," and you see a pile of moldy straw, how about deciding that it's not really food?! Basically, the cops just don't want to push this case.

 I'd like to start working on writing a bill that would create stricter standards for animal care, and another that would allow officials to seize animals faster. Is there anyone out there with legal experience that could help? Who do you think might sponsor such a bill?

If you're upset about this situation, you can do the following:

Contact Doug Voegeli, and tell him to take real action: dvoegeli@publichealthmdc.com (608) 243-0360
Call Patrick Comfert, Animal Services Leadworker: 608-243-0309
Call Patrick's Boss,  Beth Cleary, Program Manager, Animal Services Unit: 608- 243-0327


Contact everybody's boss, Dane County Executive Joe Parisi, at:
City County Building Rm 421, 210 Martin Luther King Jr Blvd, Madison WI 53703, 608-266-4114
Contact the Belleville Police Department and urge them to follow up on the case.
Contact the Oregon Horse Association, and tell them to spread the word among their members; neglected horses need homes, push the officials to prosecute, and never do business with Mary Loeffelholz!

The Kentucky Derby Rocks & Sucks

It's almost Derby Day!

I love the Kentucky Derby. I also hate it, but we'll get to that in a few minutes. Focus on the positive: People get dressed up in huge silly hats, drink drinks they'd avoid at any other time, and are captivated by two minutes of a sport they don't understand, but love anyway. Gorgeous horses, intense action, incredible backstories-- it's all on display at the races! May 5th people-- mark your calendars!

I have a confession: I make my Derby winner pick by how awesome the horse's name is. Here's this year's field of runners (subject to change of course) and my name judgement:

Awful:
Bodemeister
Daddy Long Legs

Interestingly, there really is a complicated, rule-filled process for naming racehorses.

Daddy Nose Best
Hansen
Went the Day Well
Dullahan

Boring:
Creative Cause
Gemologist
Optimizer
Prospective
Alpha

Not Bad:
Trinniberg
Done Talking
I'll Have Another
Liaison
My Adonis
Rousing Sermon
Take Charge Indy
Union Rags

Awesome!!
El Padrino (The Godfather)
Sabercat

I think Sabercat is the cooler name, but I also love the way El Padrino flops his big ears slightly out to the side when he runs, so I'm rooting for him:

And you know what? This is a totally legitimate way to pick a winner, because basically, the horses are all the same. No, I'm not talking about the fact that they're all young (three) and have had relatively few races by which to judge their performances. No, I'm not talking about the fact that they're all basically brown except Hansen. I'm talking about the ROT that has seeped into horse racing: inbreeding.

Every single horse on the Derby field is a cousin to his or her competitors. Not just a cousin in the way that many horses of the same breed are distantly related-- we're talking close family ties here.

Go back up and click on each of the horses' names. The links will take you to their pedigrees. What do you notice? The same names, over and over and over again! Northern Dancer, Secretariat, Mr. Prospector, Bold Ruler, Seattle Slew, War Admiral and their immediate descendents were bred and re-bred and then re-bred to those they sired, effectively making the racehorse gene pool as shallow as a Kardashian in front of a camera.

"I buy myself a gift every year, so this year I bought everything I wanted." -- Kim Kardashian

The little colored boxes show when a horse has direct inbreeding in their family tree. So on Alpha's pedigree, they show that Northern Dancer is Alpha's great-grandpa AND great-great-great grandpa, and that Native Dancer appears twice as well. However, those little colored boxes just scratch the surface of the truth. Northern Dancer's grandpa was Native Dancer!

Now go look at I'll Have Another's pedigree. Northern Dancer appears three times, and Raise a Native (Native Dancer's son) appears twice.

We've just been following the Native Dancer re-breedings within five generations. Now go look at how many times the other famous horses were re-bred into family lines!

If Thoroughbreds were humans, this is probably what they'd look like:

So why does this happen? Well, of course racehorse breeders want to win, so they breed to winners, and re-breed to winners, hoping the offspring will get the magical gene combination of their illustrious ancestors.

"Winning" in this case just means the ability of young horses to go very fast for a short distance. Breeding purely for disposable speed, not for soundness/health or genetic diversity, has led Thoroughbreds down a dangerous path. As well all know, breeding heavily for certain traits results in dangerous health problems. In Quarter Horses, there's HYPP, in Arabians it's SCID, in German Shepherds it's hip dysplasia, many bulldogs can't give birth naturally because of the big-headed thing, etc etc etc.

 Thoroughbreds are being bred to look like greyhounds-- thin bones, long pasterns, skinny bodies, etc. It increases their speed-- but the delicate physique also results in more injuries. Added to the inbreeding and being raced at a young age, Thoroughbreds aren't so much horses anymore as much as they are living toys-- produced to be played with, broken quickly, then thrown away. American racetracks are complicit in this crime, allowing trainers to dope their horses with pain-killers, respiratory boosters and other drugs to maximize their horses' performances. Articles here and here. (By the way, European racetracks are much more strict about the use of drugs, and have far fewer injuries on racetracks.) The end result is thousands of off-track thoroughbreds being euthanized after serious injuries sustained at a young age, or sent to slaughter by age six.

That's why, as much as I love the Kentucky Derby, I also hate it. I hate that we've taken the athleticism a horse is capable of, and reduced our largest event celebrating it to a two-minute sprint. I hate that we're ruining horses, and maybe even the Thoroughbred breed, to win that two-minute sprint. I hate the cruelty competition like this can result in.

I'd like to see racing become a more diversified sport. Let's do away with sprinting-only races; let's add in some jumping, some real distance and some trail obstacles. That would require breeders to breed for more diversified traits, like soundness, endurance, temperament and intelligence. It would also encourage them to wait to race horses until they're old enough to be able to handle that kind of race. Oh wait-- we already have that. The sports are called Endurance Racing, Competitive Trail and Limited Distance-- my favorite equine sports!

Cyndi Plasch Beating A Horse at Midwest Horse Fair

If you're looking for my video of Asia Voight doing psychic readings for horse owners, click here. If you're looking for my full report on her, head on over to Snarkyrider. Now onto breaking news:

Wisconsin horse trainer Cyndi Plasch was caught on video tape at the Midwest Horse Fair repeatedly hitting a horse with a wiffle bat in order to force it into a trailer:

Cindy Plasch was heavily involved in gaited horses, as an owner, trainer and coach. She worked at the Missouri Foxtrotter Riding Academy (warning: site may be down due to heavy traffic) located at the Driftless Valley Ranch in Mazomanie, WI. The Upper Midwest Missouri Foxtrotter Association has just removed her from its board, but we don't know whether Driftless Valley has fired her or not. The Midwest Horse Fair organization has issued a statement condemning Plasch's actions, but we don't yet know if she will be allowed to come back next year. Hopefully, all of the media attention, including this video which has an interview with person who caught the abuse on tape, will mean permanent banishment for Plasch. Several witnesses have attempted to get some legal action going, but so far it seems officials are treating the incident as harmless. If you disagree, you can contact:

Timothy Frank
Animal Services Officer
Public Health-Madison & Dane County
Ph. 608-243-0310 or try (608) 266-4821


Or write to:

health@cityofmadison.com


Public Health Administrative Office
Attn: Animal Services
210 Martin Luther King
Jr. Blvd, Room 507
Madison, WI 53703

Plasch has now released a statement defending herself:

"Attempts to load the horse had been going on for an hour and a half prior," and "gentler methods such as tapping and using treats were used at the start and were not successful." She also said in the statement that the horse had become violent.  

Can anyone say, "lame excuse to throw a temper tantrum?" I have a challenge for you, dear readers: let's see how many ways we can come up with to get a balky horse into a trailer that don't involve beating it with a plastic bat. I'm willing to bet that most of you are not trainers, yet you can come up with dozens of better ways. Ready? I'll start us off:

- Using a butt rope.
- Training a horse extremely well prior to a major show, so that this is less likely to happen in the first place.
- Lunging the horse immediately after he refuses to go in the trailer, teaching him that refusal = more work than cooperation.

Several people have defended Plasch, saying stuff like, "A plastic wiffle bat doesn't hurt,"  "everyone loses their temper sometimes," and "the horse was aggressive." To which I reply:

A wiffle bat doesn't hurt much, but can you imagine how afraid this horse was? And the next time he even sees another trailer, he'll be even more afraid because of what he's experienced. Violence of any kind is never an appropriate training technique. Yes, everyone loses their temper, but this is an adult professional entrusted with the care of children and other peoples' horses. Even if she couldn't be adult enough to handle her shit, she could have found a better way of taking out her frustration. However, I don't believe this was spontaneous at all; ask yourself why a trainer would be carrying a large plastic wiffle bat around at a show unless they intended to use it exactly for this purpose. I'm betting beating balky horses into and out of trailers is Cyndi Plasch's favorite technique. Finally, this horse was not aggressive. Despite being whaled on with a bat, I didn't see him try to kick or bite even once in this video-- hardly the behavior of an aggressive horse. But even if it was an aggressive horse, does that warrant repeated beatings with a bat? Um, no. That's not how you deal with an aggressive horse, that's how you make one worse.

Cyndi Plasch = Scum. Spread the word.

 

Update: Plasch was eventually fined $429 (only after huge public pressure).

Midwest Horse Fair 2012: Hitting the Highlights

Ah, the Midwest Horse Fair!  Acres of horses, ponies, tack, jewelery, costumes, trainers, books, supplements, art, food, pony rides-- basically a giant horse-themed amusement park/mall descends on Madison, WI once a year for three days.

It's hard to even begin to blog about this event, because there's so much material, good and bad, to work with. That's why I've decided to split things up. The snarkiest, nastiest material I have is focused on Asia Voight, an "animal communicator" (a.k.a psychic), and that post will shortly (I hope) be featured over at fuglyblog. I may also do some separate in-depth posts on other subjects. This post right here is just going to hit the highlights-- but oh, what highlights! Strap on your helmets folks, let's start this ro-day-oh:


The Good

The Midwest Renegades is a trick-riding association, and although I'm not pleased about their lack of helmets, they are incredible riders. The young ladies I saw hung upside-down by one leg at a canter! Check out the beginning of their routine in this video. Sorry I didn't get the whole thing; some people directly in front of me decided that the middle of the show would be a great time to stand up and mill around.

The farrier competitions at MWHF are incredible to watch. Teams of expert farriers from across the nation compete against each other to create the best specialty horseshoes from scratch, in front of roaring furnaces and cheering crowds. Pictured here in the green shirt is Tom Petersch and his team from Bozeman, MT and in the black shirt, Robbie Mederos and his team from Danville, CA.

Terry Fenwick and his wife are the good folks behind America's Equine Soccer League, a grassroots effort here in WI to provide a fun way to train your horse, interact with others and do something productive in the winter. The Fenwicks are looking for people to host soccer games in their indoor or outdoor arenas, and are willing to give prospective hosts and players a ton of support. Terry is even willing to do a soccer-ball-desensitization-and-training clinic at your barn for just the cost of gas. By liking their Facebook page, you have a chance to win one of their giant horse soccer balls! The Fenwicks organized several soccer matches in the Nutrena Arena during the fair, and they were a blast to watch. I want to try!!

One of the coolest things about MWHF is the accessibility of the horses. Horses are ridden, driven and led right through the crowds of people milling around. You can get right up close to the most gorgeous equines and talk to their owners. It seems as though the risk to people, many of whom are not horse-experienced, would not be allowed. However, nearly every horse and rider I met seemed calm, competent and very prepared for the excitement. I applaud the professionalism on display.

This is the PRE (Andalusian) stallion Amadeo, my favorite hunk on Stallion Avenue. He's six years old, stabled in Oswego WI, and working on level 2 dressage. I wasn't a huge fan of his handler, but Amadeo was incredible.

I was disappointed that there weren't many horse rescues at the fair, but I was delighted to discover one I'd never heard of before: Holy Land Donkeys from Mount Calvary WI. I have always had a soft spot for the long-eared-fuzzies, but this was the first time I'd seen standard-sized donkeys and mammoth donkeys in person. I fell in love immediately. I hope to volunteer there at their Donkey Days event in October.


The Bad

The Mill Creek Hunt Club is seeking members. But you must ride English and dress in club-approved clothing, you must braid you and your horse's hair in approved fashions, and you absolutely must speak with a slightly snobbish inflection. Oh, and you need to like running down and killing coyotes with dogs. Coyotes will occasionally kill a barn cat or chicken that's been carelessly left out at night, but otherwise they are useful, not dangerous. These small, dog-like animals eat pests like rats, mice and rabbits, and clean up roadkill and other dead animals. Why shoot nature's garbageman? Well, because apparently foxes are in shorter supply.

Unfortunately, the Quarter Horse folks were at it again with their peanut-rolling antics. My mother, who is not a horse person, watched this exhibition with me. As soon as the horses stepped into the arena, she asked, "Are those horses sad or something?" Every one of them had heads drooping down to their knees, stiffly jerking around in a parody of a lope. Don't get me wrong, there were some impressive horses and riders-- I particularly enjoyed the trick-riding cowboy and the lady who reined with no bridle. It's just that I hate to see a working breed reduced to extremely artificial gaits in the name of fashion.

The notorious Asia Voight claims that you can become a horse whisperer in minutes, save thousands of dollars in vet bills, and fix any training problem, including bucking, biting, rearing and bolting...just by psychically talking to your horse. If you don't have the knack, don't worry-- you can pay her $150 for a half-hour phone call, during which she will connect with your horse using only a photograph. I've got video of her doing some hilarious "psychic readings," and some great quotes, but I'll hold off until the Fuglyblog post.

This is "Muffin," a 22 year old curly mare who looked pretty miserable. I'm not sure what was going on with her skin/coat, but she looked apathetic and had diarrhea. A posted sign claimed that the marks on her face were halter scars from past abuse (before the current owner). Why bring a horse to the fair in this generally poor condition? The owner appears to be Elizabeth Brownlie, though the tag was hard to read. Poor Muffin.

The gaited horses were a pleasure to watch-- except for this man, who simultaneously rode and drove these Puerto Rican Paso Finos. It looked difficult and just plain dangerous to me, though I admit I'm no expert.

As usual, the Gypsy Vanner crowd provided some entertainment. This particular photo shows a stallion who was obviously unprepared for doing Liberty. He kept running back to the gate and pacing at the fence, frightened. His handler, a guy with a weird mullet-ponytail, didn't help-- he kept running around, cracking the whip and flashing it around the stallion's head to try to get him to run around and show off. The crowd around me eventually got so impatient with the failed show and stupid whip antics, they started calling for the handler to halter the horse.

The Great Lakes Friesians were awesome-- better than last year, actually, and certainly better than some other Friesian organizations. However, this side-saddle rider partially ruined the exhibition for me by holding her horse's head cranked down to its chest the entire time she was in the ring. This picture doesn't even show the worst of it, though he's clearly behind the vertical here.

Oh, and one more thing. PEOPLE! DO. NOT. STOP. IN. THE. MIDDLE. OF. THE. AISLES!!!!! Seriously, I know there's stuff you want to look at, but step off to the side. Other people are trying to move! This applies not only inside, where there are hoards of people, but outside as well, where there are 1,000 pound animals that need to get through! I saw two girls literally stopped to braid each others' hair inside the packed vendor area. I saw women park their double-wide strollers across aisles while they stopped to look at cowgirl bling. Arghh!

The Weird & Wonderful

Just because I don't approve of breeding solely for color doesn't mean I can't appreciate unusual colors. This is a champagne Appaloosa. It's hard to tell in this picture, but he had caramel-colored eyes! He is a stallion, by the way, though I didn't manage to find out his name or owner. Actually, his conformation seemed pretty nice.

Everything you could possibly want to buy, in any color, is available at the Midwest Horse Fair! This saddle was adorned with genuine Swarovsky crystals.

The Belgian "Big Jake," the tallest horse in the world, once again graced the fair with his presence. He stands over 20 hands high, and weighs about 2,600 pounds. That means his shoulder is taller than an average man's head, and he's 2-3 times the weight of an average riding horse. He lives at Smokey Hollow Farm near Poynette, WI. Horses this size can drink 20+ gallons of water per day, and eat 50+ pounds of food per day.

Watching the Oneida tribe do some traditional dances was really cool. However, I was a bit confused. I was expecting Native Americans from the plains region on horseback. Oneidas, of course, didn't traditionally have horses-- horses were of much less use in heavily wooded areas. I think this was MWHF's attempt to throw some of that "heritage" theme into the proceedings. Not that I minded, because the dancers were great; I just think it's funny (or sad?) that most people immediately associate Indians with horses, no matter which tribe, and that's probably really the reason the Oneidas were invited.

Good Intentions, Heinous Results

Today we have two stories coming out of Illinois.

First, an animal "rescuer's" mistrial, and why her defenders should shut up:

Dawn Hamill was featured on Fuglyblog about a year ago, when her Painted Pastures Animal Rescue & Sanctuary was raided. Officials seized over 100 animals, many of them very sick, from filthy conditions. Hamill had 63 dogs, at least six horses, plus rabbits, pigs, goats, cats, llamas and sheep...on only three acres. Original news article and video here, along with an audio quote from Dawn herself, saying that she's totally innocent of any wrongdoing. Another article here. Multiple dead animals were found on Hamill's property, located in the suburbs of Chicago. One was a three year old mini mare.

Now, Hamill's criminal trial has been declared a mistrial. Larry Draus, the lead investigator and main witness in the case, has been charged with extortion in a case involving an illegal cigarette ring. Draus may not be able to testify, and if he can, his already shaky credibility will be further in doubt. Draus was criticized for sloppy procedures in Hamill's case. Although there's plenty of photo and video evidence of horrific conditions, it may not be enough now that Mr. Asshole Dirty Cop has tainted things. Many of the charges against Hamill were heavily dependent on Draus's word. It's unknown whether Dawn Hamill will face the same charges at a new trial, if there IS a new trial.

There are plenty of people who support Dawn vehemently, posting all over her Facebook, talking to the media, etc. They're all statements like this one:

"I can't believe all the crazy things people are saying! Dawn always put animals first. Dawn would be out there at 6 in the morning working her butt off come rain, shine bad weather freezing cold! I know the great things she has done! it makes me wonder how many people actually know or they are just making stuff up and going on bad rumors!" --Ginger Wolfe

I absolutely believe that Dawn worked hard for the animals in her care, and did her best. Her closest neighbors even said so. I believe she genuinely cares about animals. But she's still fucking guilty. 

It doesn't matter how hard you're working, or how much you love your critters. What matters is how well the animals are actually cared for. It's obvious Hamill was struggling to give animals basic vet care and sanitation. No fucking wonder; spending just five minutes with each of 130 animals would equate to an almost 11 hour day. But you shouldn't say, "oh poor Dawn, look how she struggled," you should think, "this lady is a selfish, blind bitch for taking on dozens more animals than she can realistically manage."

Rescuing animals is a choice. Taking on dozens and dozens of animals is a choice. Dawn chose to take on so many that they ended up sick and filthy. She should be punished for that choice. Why is it that with any other crime, we don't much care about intentions, but with animal neglect, good intentions are a free pass? We don't have much sympathy for people who drive while drunk and then kill others in an ensuing cash. Sure, they don't mean to kill people, but they make bad choices that resulted in tragic deaths. Dawn didn't mean to make animals suffer but she did.

Every time I am tempted to adopt several more animals, I remind myself of stories like this. I could potentially support more rescue horses-- I've got a big pasture, I could scrape together more cash for winter hay, etc. But could I support many more horses and do it well? No. I know what my realistic capacity is. Dawn Hamill's lack of that same self-awareness is criminal.

Speaking of Good Intentions...

We move on to a tragic barn fire that killed at least 18 horses happened in McHenry, Ill. M&R Overlook Farm and Black Tie Stable was quickly devastated by a large fire a few days ago. The farm wasn't near any fire hydrants, forcing the 21 responding fire departments to truck in water. This slowed their ability to put out the blaze, and now there's nothing left of the large stable complex except blackened remains. Article and video here. The horses were mostly Arabians, and foals are among the dead. Madison Wallraf, a teenager who boarded at the barn, heroically entered the fire and saved many. However, some horses are still missing, and are either loose or dead but not yet found. Officials say the fire may have been started by a burning charcoal grill near the barn.

Don't have fire near the barn!

I can't think of anything more flammable than a barn. It's usually an old building, full of hay, shavings, dust, chaff, cobwebs, Neatsfoot oil, motor oil and gas for mowers and other machinery... so why would you risk having any kind of fire near it? My heart goes out to the owners and boarders at Black Tie, but their tragedy is a powerful reminder not to take risks. Pay attention to burn bans for your state, don't allow any kind of flame near your barn, and don't even have fire anywhere on your property if there's a decent wind. No one means to have a barn fire...but good intentions won't stop an errant ember.

A New Home for Nash

Nash has a new home!

This morning Nash happily stepped off of the trailer and into his forever home. It's Old Stage Alpcas, near Edgerton, WI, a fiber farm and sanctuary for llamas and alpacas. Jennifer Lafoe is the wonderful lady who runs this place, providing excellent care for critters who have been through as much as Nash has.  Jennifer says that, like the horse market, the llama/alpaca market nosedived a few years ago, and the once-trendy animals continue to be abandoned, auctioned off and even sent to slaughter.

 Jennifer supports her herd entirely out of her own pocket. She works full-time as a nurse at UW Madison and gets a little income from the yearly shearing. The camelids share space with a pot-bellied pig, two dogs, several goats, a couple of mini mules and a horse. Almost all of her animals were surrendered to her over several years from private citizens or through the county, more than a dozen of them from a single hoarding/neglect situation.

My favorite part of bringing Nash to Old Stage Alpacas was when Jennifer's herd suddenly saw Nash, and en mass, charged towards the fence. Here's a video of that, but warning: it was really windy when I was filming so the audio is awful-- it's probably better just to turn the sound off.

 He'll be introduced gradually, but he's in his own paddock for now so that he can adjust to his new surroundings. He already seems to love them-- he jumped right off the trailer and explored with enthusiasm.

 I'll post a few more pictures below.

If you want the back story on how I rescued Nash, a neglected llama running wild on a dairy farm, with the help of friends, the hindrance of a crazy lady, and a vet with a blowgun, just type "llama" into the search bar in the left corner up there. You'll get at least five separate blog posts of llama drama. Before I sign off though, I'd like to mention an awesome phone call I got while trying to find Nash a new home.

• Chris Stull in Pennsylvania helps run the Southeast Llama Rescue, a network of haulers, foster folks, adopters and rescuers. She was incredibly helpful to talk to, and offered to try to organize a transportation chain to get Nash to a top-rated llama rescue in Indiana. She rocks. Fortunately however, I found a local alternative. Anyway, she was great.

WI Abusers of the Month & Happy B-day ASPCA

Tarry Smithey and his wife Renee Smithey in Melrose, WI, neglected about 70 animals, including horses, chickens, mules and dogs, chaining them to walls or putting them in small cages with little food and no water. Article here. Another here.

Apparently the couple may have been living in the barn, since it was equipped with a bed and satellite TV. Which is pretty gross-- in some spots the manure was so high, the animals' backs were nearly touching the ceiling. Guess what their punishment is? Tarry is getting three years of probation and a $1,215 fine. Renee has been charged, but not sentenced yet. And though most of the animals were seized, they get to keep two dogs and two mules. What?! Why?!

Christ on a crutch, when are people going to get more than a slap on the wrist for this kind of crap?! If you're as unhappy as I am, you can contact the Jackson County District Attorney at 307 Main St, Black River Falls, WI 54615 (715) 284-0242. If you've got any room to take on one of the rescued critters, you can contact the local animal shelter (also in Black River Falls) at 715-284-0251. They don't have a website yet. They're on Petfinder, but haven't uploaded the newly rescued animals there yet obviously. Remember, don't yell at them, they have no legal power to investigate or prosecute abuse. That's the DA's job.

Oh, and "Tarry" isn't a typo, it's the way redneck parents spell Terry. Here's the lovely couple:

...ewwwww. Aren't they gross? Tarry was previously charged with theft, forgery and poaching. Renee apparently has mental problems...or at least uses that as a legal defense. Ok, let's move on to a happier topic:

 It's the ASPCA's 146th Anniversary! Wow. They were here before waaay the Humane Society! Founded in 1866 in New York, it was the first organization of its kind in America (though the RSPCA in Britain came first). They tried to stop cock fighting and animal vivisection (which was done without any anesthesia) and created the first ambulance service for injured working horses. They fought to pass some of the first anti-animal cruelty legislation in the U.S. Yay! Check out their blog here.

Hey folks, one more little note:

Wisconsin is under a burn ban because of extremely hazardous conditions. If you were thinking about doing a controlled burn on your pasture, starting up the burning barrel or throwing your cigarette butts on the ground, think again. Video here.