Stumpy-necked Month Old Grade Foal: $4,000!

Sometimes there will appear to be a lull in stupidity in the Wisconsin horse world. I become slightly optimistic during these times. I think, "Gee, it's probably just that I haven't been paying attention, or that the weather has kept the real idiots inside, but maybe, just maybe, people are getting better!"

But no. It always turns out I really haven't been paying attention. Today, I present to you Crystal Ackerman!

Awww, what a cute thing to teach your horse!
Until he reaches 600 pounds and tries it...

Crystal is from Fennimore, WI, and she's a strong contender for a gold medal in stupidity. It's like there's some Backyard Breeder Olympics I'm unaware of.

Check out this Craigslist ad, where she's selling a month-old foal. Nowhere does she say anything like, "he can go home with you after weaning in five months." Uh, well, maybe she would clarify that part once someone contacted her and agreed to pay...  
HOLY CRAP, $4,000?!
Four thousand dollars?
Four thousand dollars?
For a yet-to-be-registered draft mix baby?
For this stumpy-necked, untrained mutt?
Dear God, why?!
Ohhhhh right, because it's part Gypsy Vanner. *massive eyeroll*
And if she truly believes that thing is worth so much, why keep it behind barbed wire?! If you had an expensive car, would you habitually drive it on rutted roads covered in bits of glass?!
Good job capping those T-posts, I guess?! How pointless.
My mind is officially boggled. Click the ad below to see it full-size.

 This foal isn't the only animal Crystal is interested in making a quick profit on. She also put up a bulldog puppy for sale-- at seven weeks old. (Reminder: 8 weeks is considered the minimum, to ensure the health and proper socialization of the dog.)

Besides horses and bulldogs, Crystal also breeds Great Danes and chinchillas. Apparently, she also considers herself qualified to train. Just look at these incredibly safe techniques! See more on her website.

Well hey, let's try to end on a positive note, shall we? I guess we can say that all of Crystals pictures show her umpteen animals as being healthy and in clean environments. Oh, and she has a nice sticky butt when it comes to riding. Good job Crystal, I marginally accept you as not absolutely the worst horse owner ever.

See, I can be nice!

Shame on UW River Falls

Alright, yes, somewhere, somehow, people need to learn proper horse breeding techniques. Preferably at a school, where responsible, experienced adults are there to supervise. The University of Wisconsin River Falls apparently decided to start filling that role, and thus, their horse breeding program was founded!

...except they left out the "responsible" part.

This guy's name is "Rambos Smoking Hot." The name alone is nearly criminal. He was bred, along with a couple dozen other colts, at UW River Falls, broke to ride before age two, and sold at auction last year. Oh, and before they shoved him into the ring, they bred him to two mares. At two years old. He's not totally horrible looking...though his left rear leg looks very turned-out, he neck is rather short, and I think he's a bit tied in at the knee. But hey, sure, break and breed him before age two! What?!

Here's the list of two-year-olds up for sale this year. There's forty-three of them. It's unclear how many have been bred by UW River Falls and how many have been consigned, but a disproportionately large number of them are stallions.   ( Looks like I'm wrong about this one-- thanks for the correction JayGirl!)

Why is a state-sponsored school irresponsibly pumping out tons of foals every year when we have so many excess horses? Do they really need that many to teach with?

Why is UWRF breaking horses at age two or earlier, when research clearly shows that doing often results in lasting harm to the horse? A two year old horse is equivalent to a 11-13 year old human. Just because they're big enough to do some homework doesn't mean they're physically or mentally ready to start full-time work like loping into sudden turns.

Finally, why is UWRF breeding two year old stallions to mares, before the stallions have any kind of performance record, or proven ability at anything?

Oh, and here's the cherry on the cake: not only are they irresponsible breeders, they're irresponsible owners. I just got an email from a Yahoo group, about how they're selling off their old school horse(s) for cheap rather than give them a decent retirement:

"University of Wisconsin River Falls is having their annual colt sale May 5.  After the colts from the reining class are sold they will be selling some of the schoolies.  One up for sale this year is Armani.  He is a Selle Francaise I believe and is about 20 years old and was a 3rd level dressage horse before being given to UWRF.  He has been used in beginning hunter/jumper classes as well as advanced classes.  Had an injury in the pasture a few years back but has no issues because of it.  Coach for the hunter/jumper team has never had issues with him and he can handle beginners as well as intermediates and advances though does require lighter work just due to age.  He's a great boy. I've ridden him myself and seen video of some VERY bad riders on him.  Not so much as a twitch or a bat of an eye.  He's just great. They're looking for about $350-500 for him.  At least dealer price on him.  Had some unscrupulous buyers the last few years and all of us who have been around and ridden this old boy want him to go to a great home.  Thanks so much!

contact info for Armani: Kris Hiney at UWRF (715) 425-3704 or email at kristina.hiney@uwrf.edu   She can be a little slow in responding especially during spring since she's in charge of the breeding stallions and mares at the school so please be patient if you don't contact her.  If you don't hear from  her in a week try again. "

When I tried to find any more information about Armani or any of the other UWRF school horses for sale, on the school's website or anywhere else, I found nothing.

SO, not only are they dumping off old school horses that have give them years of service, they're not even bothering to advertise them well in order to find them decent homes. Armani sounds like a fabulous horse, one any dressage kid would die to have, and I found out about it via a fan of the school posting on a Yahoo email list?! Maybe, just maybe, they could concentrate on taking care of their hard-working seniors rather than pumping out more babies?! Or at least try to do even a half-assed job of promoting them when they do dump them? Armani is about 50 years old in human years-- a hell of a time to shove him into an auction ring. It's like all those guys who are laid off from their factory jobs in their 50s, replaced by Chinese or Mexican workers overseas...except more sad, because horses don't even have welfare and social security to fall back on.

Dear River Falls: you do not have, "one of the strongest equine programs in the nation," with, "the latest theories on nutrition and exercise, to breeding, raising, training and riding young horses." If you did, you wouldn't act like irresponsible bastards.

Very Cheap Foals

Click to enlarge.

This ad epitomizes exactly what the problem with backyard breeders is.

Good job, whoever bred these guys! They're being sold for the cost of a tank of gas. Does that make you feel good about the lives you brought into the world? What are these foals' futures going to be like, having had to deal with malnutrition, lack of handling and rock-bottom values at six months old? Was this worth endangering the lives of the mares that gave birth to them?

I'm also not too happy with the poster of this ad. I'd much prefer "a kind of a rescue" to really be a rescue. In other words, before you stick these poor foals on Craigslist, get that colt up to weight, geld him and get some halter training on them both! This isn't a rescue, this is dumping problems on someone else. However fugly these guys are, if they were at decent weight, leadable, wormed and over their winter fuzzies, they would have a much better chance of finding decent homes. And if the "rescuer" here can't provide those things, why did they bother taking the foals in the first place?!

Sad sad sad... there are just too many grade foals out there.

Crazy Craigslist Horses Roundup

 

LOL, this is hilarious. I'm not sure what's going on there, but the pony is obviously caught in the middle! 

Now then, we have this lovely ad from a sixteen year old girl who would like to ride your horses. I'm unsure whether or not she wants to be paid, but I hope not. "Sue" claims to be "a very talented rider," and includes qualifications like:

"I have ridden at the Walk and Trot, and am very good at both."
"I have never had to been corrected."
"I only ride WESTERN, but am open to learn English."

Kiddo, you're at the same level I'm at-- rank amateur. A "very talented rider" can do more than walk-trot in a western saddle, and I'm guessing you've never been corrected for the same reason I've never been corrected; we've never taken real lessons. Unlike you, however, I have learned how to write real English.

Sue says, "I am open to lessons," and particularly wants you to teach her barrels and jumping (for free). She also stipulates that you must provide horses for her to ride that are totally trained/broke, quiet and within a short distance from her home. Yeah princess, and I am "open" to someone giving me free guitar lessons, on a their expensive guitar, whilst feeding me bon-bons and wiping my ass for me.

Next up is "Chex Dun It In Cream," a six year old goose-rumped stallion that's waaay downhill. His achievements include... being cremello. That's right, he's not broke, and doesn't even have a halter class under his belt. Neither his ad or the owner's hideous website mention if this guy is actually registered or not. There isn't any information about his height, health or ground manners either-- but you can buy him for the low low price of $7,500 to $10,000 (depending on if the owners want to keep breeding rights to him).
*massive eyeroll*  Well, maybe he poops gold?

But hey, let's not dwell too much on the negative. Here is a super cute, broke, Egyptian Arabian gelding for sale-- and his owners wrote a fantastic, grammatical, honest, detailed advertisement for him. Only $900! I think that in this economy, that's a reasonable price for a quality animal, who is nevertheless unregistered and needs a little more mileage. And he's black! Oh man, if I hadn't sworn off Arabians forever, I'd be seriously tempted. Also, if I had spare money for a fourth critter. And if I could ride three horses at the same time...

Scumbag Mustang Breeder

What is on this horse's face, a climbing rope? What keeps it from sliding down its nose and cutting off airflow? I don't know, but apparently Steve Edwards thinks its a good training tool.

I think you all know about how I feel about mustangs from my previous post about 'em. Quick re-cap: a horse living in the wild is a horse with a poor quality of life, and Americans are paying for them to live it. If I turned my horses loose with no reliable sources of food, water, shelter, vet care or farrier work, I'd be arrested for cruelty. Yet somehow, this is okay as long as the horse is labeled a "mustang." Mustangs, by the way, are feral horses (like feral house cats), not a breed.

So then you can imagine how I feel about people who produce tons more of these critters on purpose. Mill Swamp Indian Horses LLC of Smithfield, VA, breeds mustangs. Yes, even though there are literally thousands of homeless mustangs sitting in BLM holding facilities, waiting to be adopted, sometimes ending up at slaughter plants, Steve Edwards apparently feels he needs to make more of them.

Why? Because they're special mustangs! These ones come from North Carolina! Oooo! They mostly look like this four year old filly of his:

Yeah. Nothing spectacular there; this critter screams "fugly" all over. I'm not sure what scares me most, her incredibly upright shoulder, her tiny and steep rump, or her too-long back, which also looks slightly roached. She's available for sale on his website, for $350, and is described as, "very well built for endurance." I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. Oh, and did I mention that, despite the overwhelming American desire for taller horses, he insists on continuing to breed pony-sized ones? I'm sure they'll sell really well. Here's what he has to say on that:

"I ride ponies and I am an adult. I ride ponies and I am a large adult. I ride ponies and I ride them long and hard. I have ridden Holland, a 13 hand Shackleford [mustang], fifty miles in a day on several occassions [sic]."

Yeah, that scrawny horse totally looks comfy, carrying half its body weight. Tell you what Mr. Edwards, let's have you carry around half of your body weight for fifty miles. Anyway, that's not the only idiotic thing he has to say, in my opinion:

"I teach natural horsemanship to students as young as five years old."

Yeah, 'cause that's totally safe and effective. What the hell?!

“We got him [a wild horse] home at 4:15 and he was completely halter trained in 45 minutes. Within twenty four hours he comfortably wore a saddle and took a child on his back."

I am so impressed with his ability to endanger children. And his truthfulness about his training. On the other hand, maybe it IS true: I bet any pony that gets weighed down until the point of exhaustion acts pretty tame. Don't get me wrong, some ponies are built to carry adults; just not these scrawny, badly-conformed guys.

"Distracting arguments over whether or not crops, spurs, laying a horse down, and the use of snaffle bits were inherently cruel have driven too many people away from natural horsemanship."

Yeah, let's just ignore all that distracting morality crap. Who needs to decide what's right and wrong? Bah.

"A few years ago a grainy you tube image of Linda Parelli working a one eyed horse was deceptively used to accuse her of cruelty to the horse. It was a great piece of work that was utterly inaccurately characterized by Parelli opponents."

He's talking about a widely-known video, in which Mrs. Parellia obviously doesn't know what the hell she's doing, and clearly traumatizes the horse. I'd like to post a link to it, but it's mysteriously disappeared off of the internet...

"Mill Swamp Riders do not learn how to win ribbons in the show ring. They do not learn how to sit up straight and demonstrate 'classical riding skills.' Instead they learn how horses think and how to develop real relationships with horses." 

Gosh, I didn't know that my horse needs hugs more than she needs a rider who knows that the hell she's doing in the saddle! Thank God. Now I don't have to feel bad when I bounce all over her back. She might be more sore and harder to control, but as long as our "relationship" is good, I can totally skip learning to ride!

Oh, and have I mentioned his "Off Site Breeding Program?" It's designed to save this "special breed" from "extinction." (Clearly Edwards doesn't know that fugly grade horses are quite populous in America.) Anyway, the rules don't say anything about a breed standard, health or conformation, but they do say that a mare should produce at least four foals, that no one can charge a stud fee, that you should register a new mustang foal in three bullshit horse registries, and that owners should show off their critters in every way possible, in order to get publicity for the "breed." Of course, none of the rules are mandatory, because hell, Edwards wouldn't want anyone to have to have standards or anything. Sounds like a backyard breeder's paradise to me! In fact, you can breed to his four stallions if you want to. Including this one:

Yay for more child endangerment!

Edwards justifies his obsession with these scrawny mustangs by saying that they're "rare" and "descended from Spanish horses." Mister, just because there's not many of something, and it has ancestors from somewhere, does not make it valuable. By his logic, I should be able to sell my disfigured rescue llama for a ton of money, because A) there aren't very many llamas around here, much less disfigured ones, and B) it has ancestors from South America.

Anyway, Edwards wanted to prove that his beloved feral horses were descended from Spanish horses, so he took a "team of inspectors" (probably him and his buddies) to look for skeletons of dead mustangs, "...to confirm that the herd was composed of horses that bore the unique vertebra of the original horses of the Spanish colonists." If ever I heard bullshit quack science, that's it right there. There's no difference between the backbone of a Spanish horse and a Quarter Horse. Seriously. Go look up the breed descriptions of Andalusians, Lusitanos and any other Spanish horses you can think of. Arabians sometimes have one less lumbar vertebrae.

Now look: my problem with Edwards is not his passion. Millions of people, including me, become obsessed with rather silly things like reality tv or model trains, and the world keeps turning. My problem is that his hobby directly affects the welfare of living creatures. Breeding badly-conformed ponies just for the sake of having more of them around, when we already have tons of unwanted grade horses (including mustangs) is the very definition of irresponsible breeding. Those animals almost certainly aren't going to stay sound, be competitive in equine sports or find and keep homes easily. His propaganda encourages others to breed more of the same. And not only to breed fugly horses, but to train them with crazy methods in the belief that these "special" horses are somehow as safe as puppies. From his website:

"Steve Edwards gave me the courage to do what most everyone else thought could not be done----ride a wild mustang that I trained myself without any experience or lessons at age 58. He said it could be done, and I believed him."

--Vicki, Goochland, VA

Yeah, because it's a GREAT idea for totally inexperienced people to train wild horses! Go Steve! Yay!

And Edwards isn't just getting satisfaction from his hobby. Nope, he's probably making money from his bullshit, by way of his online classes, training clinics, book sales, dvd sales, stud fees, riding classes, horse tours, adoption fees and charity fund. Oh, and did I mention his stores, with souvenirs like jewelery and t-shirts?

Say it with me folks: Scum. Bag. Scumbag.

Wiener Horses: "Very Conformationally Correct"

"Very conformationally correct" LOL

Yes, this girl was a broodmare...

Long back, short legs, steep croup... Actually, this mare looks a lot like my Annie! Except I think Annie has a slightly better shoulder...

I know! I'll start a new breed! I'll call them "wiener horses," or "munchkin mares." I'll make millions! Hey, it worked for cat breeders...

 

 And now, for your amusement, a random video of a hilarious baby and a dachshund...

 

The Annual Winter Horse Abandonment

Pro Tip: You may want to think about trading your poor horse for a snowmobile.

Every year this happens: irresponsible horse owners suddenly realize it's winter. Yes, this totally regular and predictable season apparently comes as a shock to them. They'd been scraping along, feeding too many horses on some scruffy pasture, and suddenly there's no grass. It's cooold, which means it's no fun to go out and handle horses. Ice and snow block trails and gates. The shoddy fences are breaking down under drifts of snow. They've maxed out their credit cards on Christmas presents and New Years booze, so they have no cash to buy hay. And all of the muddy ponds and five gallon buckets that served as water tanks are frozen over! OH NOES.

The only logical response to this: Is it doing without their own comforts in order to keep the horses fed, then planning better for next year? Finding lower-cost rough board and dealing with winter chores yourself? Trying to sell a few of those extra horses? Hell no! That would be too hard! 

Just dump all the horses on someone else.

What follows is the latest round of winter dump-offs in my area, brought to my attention by various email lists, horse boards, blogs, etc. All are unaltered, original messages. My comments are in green. Note: People do dump horses all year 'round. It just seems especially prevalent, and unfortunate, in the dead of winter.

---------------------------------------------

$300. horses:
A woman dropped off 26 horses at this persons place to board and then never paid anything past the first months board. The lady that currently has the horses went thru legal channels as the horses were abandoned and now has the court's approval to sell them.
They range in all sizes and breeds, mares and geldings. Asking $300 a piece to cover their feed bill.  There is a tall dark brown dressage horse, but not sure what level he is at.
If anyone is interested, please just give Robin a call, she is always available.  Last weekend she rode most of them to see how they are and said they are just nice riding horses. Didn't have any trouble with them.

Robin Schmidt
Eagle, WI
Email:
Cell#
Please pass around and you can call or email if interested


This has got to suck soooo bad. The legal wrangling alone must have taken months. Imagine being in Robin's shoes; you're stuck with 26 horses to try to sell, in mid-winter, when no one wants an extra mouth to feed. To ensure the financial survival of your own farm, you HAVE to sell them SOON-- but your conscience is going to bother you forever if you don't take the time to make sure they find GOOD homes, of which there is a short supply. What an awful position to be in.

UPDATE: Looks like this is a hoax, folks! Sorry. It seems as though Robin may have had a minor problem with a boarder, but certainly not to the point where she had to go to court, and 26 horses were not involved! Thank goodness. I have erased her contact info. I wonder how this stuff happens? Was it simply web-drama, where a situation was blown WAY out of proportion, or was it purposeful harassment by someone who cleverly arranged for Robin's phone to ring off the hook via this sympathy ploy?

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Hello,

I appologize for such a large mass mailing but I am reaching out to my friends and colleagues who may be interested themselves or may have connections to someone who may be willing to help out my family. I am trying to put the word out to anyone who may be willing and able to add one or more horses to their family. My brother has several horses and is unable to properly care for them. He said if they are not able to find a new home for them asap, they will have to have them put down so they don’t suffer and starve. My brother, Terry, is a fireman and works very hard. He had an unfortunate accident in the Summer of 2010 where he indured a life threatening brain injury. He has made a miracalus recovery and is back to work, but his finances have suffered greatly. I’m sure he is probably feeding his horses before himself, but there is really nothing more he can do. I understand the economic times are hard all around and it is expensive to care for a horse, but if you or anyone you know has room to add one or more of these beautiful creatures you would be saving their life. I told Terry I would do what I can to get the word out. Here is a list of the horses he has.

3 yrs 50/50 Arabian, Checkner Male No Training

2-6yrs Arabian – Black Male Halter Broke

2-6yrs Arabian Male Halter Broke

2-6yrs Arabian Male Halter Broke

2-6yrs Arabian Male Halter Broke

14-15yrs Thouroughbred Female Trained

9m Saddlebred/Arabian Male Halter Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

3-10yrs Arabian Female Broke

(HIS Sibling Not Mine- carol)My brother’s contact info:

His name is Terry Condon, cell phone number is 608-434-7508 and work number is 608-245-4561. He lives in Loganville (that's also in WI).

Okay, I do have some sympathy for anyone who is injured. However, this situation didn't develop overnight. Terry was injured in 2010 and has only now decided he can't care for his animals? Terry himself chose to collect THIRTEEN horses in the first place-- and 13 is about nine too many for one person to handle under the best of circumstances anyway. He chose to wait until his finances were really bad to do something about getting rid of those horses-- in the middle of winter, when no one wants a horse. He has apparently also chosen to keep such poor track of his horses that there aren't even reliable descriptions of them. Also, I'll eat my hat if the mares aren't pregnant by the "males." So he's chosen to create MORE horses to deal with! ARRRrrghhhh!
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From the Refuge Farms Horse Sanctuary boards:

In the Wausau area, a woman and her husband have been evicted effective 11/29/11. The Sheriff has visited and will seize her horses "sometime next week". She has no options. We have discussed euthanizing rather than shipping.
Her herd is 5 stallions and 5 mares. The mares, she says, are not pregnant as the stallions have been seperated from them. I will follow-up with her next week and offer to support some of the costs to euthanize.
If anyone has any ideas or any space or any names - please reach me. At least for a couple of them . . . .
How sad. How horribly sad.
The mares are 2 and 4 (both of these are halter broke) and three 20 year olds off the track. All are thoroughbreds.

Later, Refuge Farms got some more (worse) information:

I am having tough time with this one.

The owner is now thinking her horses are worth some money rather than just surrendering them. And I am finding it difficult to time my calls to her when she is able to talk with me. There seems to be an addiction involved here. The first call it was 10 horses. The next call it was 12 horses. The last call she couldn't recall how many horses. I'm thinking the mares are pregnant, too. Most likely. This woman is a breeder.
My calls to the sheriff so far have gone unanswered. I'll continue to try. The owner swears she has never received a business card from a deputy and that she has never received an eviction notice, either.  


Again, I have some sympathy for those getting evicted, especially in this rough economy-- but also again, that situation did not happen overnight. You don't get evicted quickly. It takes months to get someone evicted. If this couple had financial problems and couldn't pay their rent for months, they had a responsibility to deal with the horse situation long before it required the intervention of the local sheriff and a horse rescue. They could at least have stopped breeding more horses. The fact that the woman is only now interested in getting some money out of the horses (because the rescue showed interest) is despicable. Lady, if you wanted to sell, you had time. Don't try to bilk the rescue out of money. The whole "eviction" thing could even be made up to try to get the rescue to hand over some cash or free hay.

Back to me again. There are more horses being dumped en mass out there (just browse Craigslist) but if I tried to list all of them, I'd just start punching things in rage. That's not a good idea around a computer. Anyway, if you can fit an extra horse into your life, please contact these folks. Keep the sarcasm and nastiness out of your conversations with them; it's okay to be snarky and commiserate on the internet in general, but it won't help the horses if you provoke their owners in person.

Conformation & Designer Horse Breeds

It seems like you can't go anywhere these days without seeing a Friesian. These horses are THE fashionable breed. They're a pretty color (jet black), they've got lots of long hair and they've been popularized by movies and television. (Above: "Mask of Zorro," "Alexander," "Narnia: Prince Caspian")

They're gorgeous and, like, super romantic. Which, of course, is why every backyard breeder is determined to get their hands on one and breed it to anything. Their thinking is that Friesian + anything = profit.

WRONG.

The above horse is Yukon. He's a Friesian "sport horse," in this case meaning his daddy was this Friesian (unregistered as far as I can tell) and his mom was a "warmblood." He's 17.2 hands! Wow. Pretty tall for a "sport horse." Poor guy, we might have to start calling him Yuck-on. He's downhill, with a super steep croup and a  weak hind end in general. He does have a nice shoulder, decent legs and a handsome face, but otherwise looks like a fairly unremarkable draft cross. Guess where he's at? That's right, Midwest Horse Rescue. For $500. Despite being broke to ride, with dressage training.

 

This handsome fellow is Danny, another Friesian "sport horse," also at Midwest Horse Welfare-- Free to a good home. Danny can never be ridden, because he was born with very weak pasterns, a defect apparently commonly passed on by his sire. (God forbid his owners stop breeding him to everything with a uterus...)

 

Here's Jewel, yet another Friesian mutt, recently adopted from Midwest Horse Welfare. Her conformation defects include being downhill, camped-under, short-necked, ewe-necked and goose-rumped. But by God, she's hairy, shiny and black, so she must be worth a ton of money, right?! Wrong again. She was adopted for $600-- and she was broke to ride and drive.

Now, I don't want to insult Midwest Horse Welfare, or imply that all horses who end up there are somehow defective. Some good quality horses wind up there, because their previous owners trust the very-well-run MHW to find them great homes. However, the fact that these Freisian crosses are at a horse rescue in the first place does imply that they're not the super-valueable animals some people seem to think they are. The fact that all of these horses have some pretty glaring flaws also speaks to how badly this trendy breed is being corrupted by "sport horse" breeders. I should clarify, by the way, that there are some nice-conformed, true sport horse crosses out there-- just check out the Friesian Sport Horse Registry for good examples (they have a breed standard and registry requirements and everything!). I'm just insulting the pretend ones people are breeding and calling "sport horses" because "random crossbred created with no attention paid to conformation" doesn't sound as nice.

Now let's continue our examination of ridiculous cross-breds, shall we?

Ah, here's Captain Morgan! It's just so classy to name horses after liquor brands, isn't it? Captain is a Percheron-Friesian-Arabian-- because, apparently, someone decided what the world needed was a really confused foal. He's got the weak butt of a poorly-conformed Arabian, the giant feet of a Friesian and the gut of a draft horse that's eaten too much. What's with those joints? Poor nutrition, injury or just plain ugly?  Only $900 for this weird, un-handled yearling!

...and here's Captain Morgan's sister! This time her breeders opted for classic beauty-- in name only. "Athena" is downhill, with a poor shoulder, camped out, has an unimpressive butt and may also have weak pasterns. She's not even an interesting color, despite being a Paint-Percheron-Friesian cross. Also $900.

Who are these breeders kidding? I can go to any local auction and pick up an yearling just like these guys for $100 or less-- and actually, I could probably score something with better conformation or color too. These people just don't understand that being part-designer-breed doesn't automatically give a horse more value!

I think part of the problem is the idea that a mixed breed horse is "part" anything. Let's say that you cross a Friesian with an Arabian. The foal gets genes from both parents-- but those genes aren't equally expressed. The foal won't necessarily look like a blended 50/50 mix between the two breeds. It could have a totally Arabian head, but have the color and heavy build of a Friesian. Or, it could have the massive body of a Friesian, on the tiny legs of an Arabian. Or it could even look pretty much like an Arabian! Unless you have a very prepotent sire or dam, which strongly stamps its offspring with its characteristics, even breeding horses of the same breed is a gamble. When you cross really unrelated breeds, it's REALLY a crapshoot. Athena up there looks like she came out 80% unremarkable paint. Human kids are a good example of this principle; they aren't a blended 50/50 mix of their parents. They carry strong appearance and personality traits from one or the other.

The mystique of the Friesian breed isn't a wrong thing. Practically, they're just another light draft, but there's nothing wrong with fantasizing about them. What's wrong is crossing them to everything, all the time, on the assumption that the resulting foal with be fabulous. It will just be a light-draft-cross!

Please-- stop breeding nonsensically. We have enough grade horses out there.

Ridiculous Fantasies: Expensive Registered Yearling Horses

I just don't get it.

Breeders are STILL churning out unremarkable horses and expecting people to pay top dollar for them. Check out the filly below (click the Craigslist ad to enlarge it). She's got long, weak pasterns, she's camped out behind, over at the knee and downhill. Her butt-high conformation might resolve itself with time and growth, but the rest of her issues won't. Speaking of time and growth, it's going to take three more years of vet bills, feeding, ground work and boarding costs before this filly can even go to training to be broke out. 

 

And how much is the breeder asking?

Five THOUSAND dollars!

FIVE thousand dollars!

FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS!

Why?! Because she's registered and sort of peachy-colored?

Check this out:

A registered paint horse, already very well broke and an experienced show horse, great manners-- for a fraction of the cost. At 17 he might have a touch of arthritis, but compared to the costs and risks of raising and training a youngster for three years, a little money for supplements is very well worth it. There's no picture here, so we can't judge the gelding's conformation-- but if he's still sound enough to ride after all those trail rides, he can't be any worse than the filly above!

 Some people seem to believe that raising a young horse "their way" is preferable. I think that's only true for a very few people-- those that have the time and experience to do so, and some very specific preferences. I'm thinking about higher-level show competitors mostly, the kind of folks that really want a very young horse to lope just right and are prepared to spend hours in the arena getting there. Most of us aren't at that level, and may not care to be. Most of us also really don't care whether our horse responds to a cluck or a kiss, or turns to face you or not after halting on the lunge. If we do, we can usually re-train a horse out of those minor habits-- the main thing is, it's broke!

Two-year-old Western Futurity Horses: Broke, Slow, Low & Unhappy

I think it may be true that there's a little extra bond between a horse and owner when that horse is raised by its owner-- but not always. You can't guarantee that you'll "click" with any horse, whether it's your hand-raised bottle-fed foal or an older auction pen bargain.

In short, I can't think of a good reason to buy a very young horse, unless you're a professional with a very specific purpose in mind-- or you're a sucker for a cute face at an auction :)

A Horse of a Different Color: Annie's Past & Backyard Breeders

I did promise to return to the topic of Annie's past, her neglect issues and injury, and since I'm not ready to reveal any master endurance racing fitness plan yet, this seems like a good time to do that.

I call Annie a "rescue horse," but I didn't get her from a horse rescue. I was almost done with college when I saw an ad on Craigslist (who can resist browsing horses on Craigslist?). It said something like, "Yearling paint filly. Has an injury in her hip, but really sweet. Halter broke. Don't have enough time or money. First $100 cash takes her, or she goes to auction next week."

Well, I thought I'd just "go look."

Riiiiight. If you're a horse person, you know there's no such thing.

When I got there, I found a ribby, wormy, shaggy filly in a dirt paddock. She had a strange patch on her left hip; when I asked what it was, the owner informed me that so many flies were attracted to the pus draining from the filly's wound, she (the owner) had decided to superglue a gauze patch over the top.

Do you know how fast I took that filly home?

Pretty fast.

Annie's condition was the result of bad breeding, bad management and just plain bad people.

The lady I bought her from said she gotten the filly from a breeder-- a "backyard breeder." This guy had bred a whole bunch of horses, and left a bunch of them together in a rusty, broken roundpen surrounded by junk. While being bullied by other horses, Annie got herself impaled on one of these rusted pieces of junk. The lady brought her home, glued gauze over the top of the wound and left her.

While I feel a healthy amount of hate towards Annie's second owner, the breeder who brought her into the world deserves most of my (and your) anger. Backyard breeders usually seem to think that any "colored" horse, regardless of its breeding, conformation or temperament, can be sold for a good profit. As a result, these people are breeding countless spotted/palomino/buckskin/cremello foals, many of whom meet a fate worse than Annie's. You merely have to visit any local horse auction to see a dozen of these "colored" foals, now mostly unhandled yearlings and two-year-olds, sell to the local slaughter buyer for $100 or less.

Color alone means nothing. Conformation, temperament, training and registration mean more. Breeding for color alone is irresponsible, and dooms thousands of horses to slaughter every year. We have enough unwanted horses in the United States-- let's not make more of them, even if they are PINK.

Anyway, back on topic:

After a lot of food and TLC Annie looked a lot better. Wormer and Equishine supplements made her look and feel a lot better, and the Equishine reduced the neglect-related swelling of growth plates in her legs. However, no matter how many times I cleaned out the wound in her hip, it wouldn't heal. The half-dollar-sized hole closed up to the size of a dime, but it continued to leak thick yellow-white pus. The vet came out and prescribed antibiotics for a month. The wound was less pussy-- but refused to heal. Meanwhile, Annie's personality blossomed. She became interested in people, curious about her surroundings and extremely affectionate.

After another cleaning by the vet, an ultrasound to try to figure out what was going on with the wound and another round of antibiotics, Annie went in for surgery. Despite being on a trailer ride just once before in her whole life, and NEVER having been in a stall before, she was extremely well behaved for her trip to the vet's. She came home two days later with a wound the size of a golf ball in her hip. The vets had removed a bone chip, chunks of necrotic bone and other infected material.

It took a long time for Annie to heal-- and in the meantime, her wound had to be cleaned daily, and she was on several medications. She hated her Bute (an oral pain medication), but was otherwise a very good girl.

I spent the next two years taking her for walks, working on her ground manners, teaching her to lunge (or "longe" if you prefer) and getting her used to a saddle.

At two years old, she had matured into a gorgeous young lady:

At three years old, I sent her to a trainer for 30 days of saddle training:

Adam Hoon at Pine Dance Ranch, near Lodi, WI. A great trainer!

...and now, at age 3.5, I ride her regularly around my farm. We're taking things slowly, in part because I'm lazy, but also because she's not done growing yet, and I don't believe in pushing her too hard, too fast. She sometimes still "drags" her left leg a little but seems to be in no pain and was pronounced sound by my vet. Only time will tell if the old injury will impact her performance in a serious way.

This May, Annie will turn 4 years old, and be eligible to participate in under-30-miles Competitive and Limited Distance rides. I hope to ride her regularly over this winter, working up to ten mile rides, then move to fifteen miles in early spring. From there we'll do a little trailering to area trails, and maybe even some overnight camping. Then we'll try a "real" event, probably a 15 mile Novice Division ride in Palmyra, WI, in May or June. Fifteen miles is the shortest ride offered at official events-- it's for newbies like us. By the end of the riding season (Sept/Oct), we should have worked up to 25 and 30 mile rides. 2013 will be the first year we'll be eligible to ride over-30-milers, but we probably won't do more than a couple of 50 milers. In 2014, I'll push Annie to do more 50s, and at least one 100 mile race. 2015 is our goal Tevis year. I'll be 29 and Annie will be 7-- about the same age, comparatively. That year will be scary. It may be necessary for us to travel out west a few months in advance of the Tevis in order to acclimatize to the higher altitudes, which can seriously affect the performance of horses and riders who aren't adjusted to the lack of oxygen.