Stumpy-necked Month Old Grade Foal: $4,000!

Sometimes there will appear to be a lull in stupidity in the Wisconsin horse world. I become slightly optimistic during these times. I think, "Gee, it's probably just that I haven't been paying attention, or that the weather has kept the real idiots inside, but maybe, just maybe, people are getting better!"

But no. It always turns out I really haven't been paying attention. Today, I present to you Crystal Ackerman!

Awww, what a cute thing to teach your horse!
Until he reaches 600 pounds and tries it...

Crystal is from Fennimore, WI, and she's a strong contender for a gold medal in stupidity. It's like there's some Backyard Breeder Olympics I'm unaware of.

Check out this Craigslist ad, where she's selling a month-old foal. Nowhere does she say anything like, "he can go home with you after weaning in five months." Uh, well, maybe she would clarify that part once someone contacted her and agreed to pay...  
HOLY CRAP, $4,000?!
Four thousand dollars?
Four thousand dollars?
For a yet-to-be-registered draft mix baby?
For this stumpy-necked, untrained mutt?
Dear God, why?!
Ohhhhh right, because it's part Gypsy Vanner. *massive eyeroll*
And if she truly believes that thing is worth so much, why keep it behind barbed wire?! If you had an expensive car, would you habitually drive it on rutted roads covered in bits of glass?!
Good job capping those T-posts, I guess?! How pointless.
My mind is officially boggled. Click the ad below to see it full-size.

 This foal isn't the only animal Crystal is interested in making a quick profit on. She also put up a bulldog puppy for sale-- at seven weeks old. (Reminder: 8 weeks is considered the minimum, to ensure the health and proper socialization of the dog.)

Besides horses and bulldogs, Crystal also breeds Great Danes and chinchillas. Apparently, she also considers herself qualified to train. Just look at these incredibly safe techniques! See more on her website.

Well hey, let's try to end on a positive note, shall we? I guess we can say that all of Crystals pictures show her umpteen animals as being healthy and in clean environments. Oh, and she has a nice sticky butt when it comes to riding. Good job Crystal, I marginally accept you as not absolutely the worst horse owner ever.

See, I can be nice!

All I Want for Christmas is Horse Sunshade: Another Side Effect of Breeding for Color

This is what I want for Christmas.

Yes, it would make Annie look like a duck. A giant, yellow, fluffy duck. YAY!

Seriously though, this is a good idea. Annie gets awful sunburns in the summer on her delicate pink/white nose, and she HATES sunscreen. Hates it. I attempt to put it on, she tosses her head around like I'm trying to feed her poison, I eventually get some of it on her (and the rest on ME), then she rubs it off on my shirt or the nearest fence, and then the process starts over again. 

Apparently, this is a more common problem than I thought, because the enterprising owners of this website have actually founded a business because of Paint horse owners who are sick of seeing red, scabby noses on their poor babies.

Maybe Paint breeders should take a closer look at one of the consequences of breeding for "chrome," especially on a horse's face.

Obviously sunburn is a less awful side effect of breeding for color than, say, Lethal White Syndrome, but for suffering horses who don't care what they look like, it's still a nasty problem. Note: sunburn doesn't happen on all white horses; it seems to happen most on horses with pink skin, because the lack of pigment increases the skin's vulnerability. Pink skin is more common among Paints and Appaloosas.

Unfortunately, the above mask costs like $68, and I'm poor-- so Annie will probably end up with a home-made equivalent that makes her look like an equine version of the masked Elephant Man. We'll then proceed to play a game called, "find the mask in the pasture" because I'm sure it'll stay on her face for all of 2 hours.